The Best Kept Secret Blog - The Awakening - Midlife Re-Invention

A few years ago, my friend T. asked me if I had experienced "The Awakening".

I didn't have a clue what she was talking about and immediately wondered if she had fallen prey to some weird, cult groupies. She did live in Vancouver after all.

"No, no" she insisted. "You'll go through it. It's what happens to women when our children are older, our bodies move towards menopause and we wonder what to do with the rest of our lives."

Being a late-in-life mother, my children were still young at the time and I dismissed the whole idea. But in the last few years, I think I'm beginning to understand what she was talking about.

T. calls it "The Awakening". Books and the media refer to "mid-life reinvention". Some women ask "Now what?". And one friend describes laying awake in bed at night, a sense of panic flooding through her, as she tries to figure out what to do with the rest of her life.

At first I thought it had something to do with our children growing older. After years of trying to get pregnant, then having children, then more Raffi songs than I care to remember, it's only recently with my youngest starting school full time that I've been able to come up for air.

But I'm hearing the same refrain from women who don't have children.

Is it due to the hormonal changes women experience at this stage? Maybe.

I am keenly aware that we have to be pretty high up on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs before we can give this much thought, let alone do something about it. Maybe it's a cultural thing.

Regardless of the source, it appears to be a common thread among mid-life women.

And how do women deal with "The Awakening"? From what I'm seeing, it's all over the map.

Some friends have made life-altering moves like leaving unhappy marriages. I know others who stayed but had affairs.

Many have taken practical steps like changing jobs or quitting altogether to enjoy a well-earned break. And then there are the women who take on new challenges like running a marathon.

And some find their outlet on a smaller scale. T., for instance, took up belly dancing.

Personally, I'm enjoying this state of change and restlessness. I like the sense of new adventures just ahead. Some of my friends aren't doing well while others are doing things they never dreamed possible.

It will be interesting to see the outcomes of this tugging to do something else, something more, this awakening. I plan to be there to support my friends in their quest, just as I've had support in mine. Maybe we should start a cult.